6/14/11

Today's the day..I'm officially Bankrupt.

I'm supposed to be getting ready right now, but here I sit, procrastinating by reading old emails and trying to ignore the knot in my stomach.

At 10:00 this morning, I'm going to go into a courtroom of some kind and declare my bankruptcy. It's officially called the "meeting of the creditors". The people/companies to whom you owe money to are allowed to come and protest or object to your bankruptcy. Or something like that. I kind of imagine a big, heavily-wooden courtroom like the kind they have in every John Grisham movie, with a stern, grizzled judge sitting at the helm, readers perched upon his nose, a gavel gripped in one hand. Me, standing before him, wringing a hat or maybe my sad little pile of documentation papers in my hand. Then I imagine the people representing all of the debt in my life standing at the sides, trying to bum rush me but being held back by burly bailiffs. Mr. Discover card at the front, "God Dammit, you owe us, Jenny!!!" he'll be screaming. The dentist, a former family friend and fellow resident of my peaceful little town standing there, fist in the air, "WE PUT SEALANTS ON THEIR TEETH AND YOU OWE US!!!".

I'm sure it's not going to be anything like that. I'm sure it will take place in a benign, mostly beige or white room. I've heard that none of the creditors ever show up, and that you are just asked a routine list of questions and then *poof* it's done.

I dreamed about it last night, though. In my dream I of course left my essential paperwork behind, and only realized it as the burly door-managing bailiff was locking the door so the flogging meeting could start. I begged him to let me out so I could find my paperwork, and he refused. In my dream I started crying, but WAIT...I saw a computer and printer in the corner. "Can I use those?" I asked the bailiff. He said I could. I printed out my essential documentation and then the bailiff came over, only now instead of his khaki bailiff uniform he was wearing a short terry-cloth robe, loosely tied and open all the way to his navel. He hit on me, and after the bankruptcy proceedings we made sweet, crazy love in the courtroom.

Sometimes, being me is kind of fun.

Wish me luck, friends. This is the second-to-last big duck in my row...after this one is gone, all I have left is Big Daddy, the child support in arrears and the remix of our divorce decree.

This will be an interesting summer.

Your bankrupt friend,

Jenny

7 comments:

  1. I did a bankruptcy a few years ago. No creditors showed up except for the IRS and she was really extra kind. It feels so good to have it done.

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  2. Thinking of you today Jenny! I know people that have done this for a lot less reasons you need to do this. My hope for you is, that you feel like a ton of bricks lifted off your shoulders and can move on with that added worry or stress. Now if you can get Big Daddy to pay some child support, you will be in business. Let the new chapter being in your life! Love ya! Kelly

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  3. You have sure had your share of "stuff"...

    Hope this lets you move onward and upward without all that weight on your shoulders.

    You should really think about writing that book. You have a great perspective :)

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  4. Keep your chin up, Jenny. Sometimes none of our options are good and we can only choose the one that is best for us at the time. Congratulations on putting this behind you.

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  5. Hug. I would've hugged you at the park today but with all the talk of stinky work-out clothes, well...you know.

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  6. Just read this post. Sure hope you’re better now. It sucks to know that someday you’d be facing something like this, and strangely, it’s like an adventure that you know will be filled with lots of interesting turns of events, and of course, optimism that all would go well. Good thing that there are those that give legal advice in these types of situations.

    Louisa Matsuura

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  7. So very late to the party, but thank you!!! The part about the balif in your dream seriously made me laugh out loud. And this was in between my bouts of sobbing because my husband has broken my heart. I have been reading your posts from the beginning as I try to cope with my own personal hell delivered through extramarital affairville. I was in an especially sad place tonight. Thank you for the much needed laugh! Maybe we will meet someday, I also hail from the twin cities metro.

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