So, I met with Faith, my new wellness coach, this past Sunday.
Faith and I attended the same high school, but she was a few grades younger than me so our paths didn't cross too often. We've met up at some events here and there over the past few years but really connected via facebook (can you get over how HUGE of an impact facebook has had on our lives??). She and I have a few things in common (single moms struggling to find a balance is the biggest) and when she reached out to me offering her services as a Wellness Coach I was touched. I was also thrilled, because if you're one of my 10 or so regular readers you know that I'm making some big changes in my life.
Becoming well is one of them.
I have to admit, I was nervous before our meeting. I don't know why...I wondered if I was too far gone as far as becoming healthy goes, or if I was too flighty or too scattered. I also wondered if I'd be able to do this. I'm very good at making grandiose plans for myself, only to see something shiny and get distracted halfway through.
But, no worries. Faith greeted me warmly and made me feel at ease. Our discussion was open and easy. Not once did I feel she was looking at me with any sort of judgment, condemnation or disgust (do you think I have any self esteem issues? Maybe??). We talked about my goals, her expectations, and a million other things.
One thing I was most impressed with was her candor. She shared so much about her life that it made this exposing of my life less traumatic. If you know me, you know I'm pretty much an open book, but sitting in front of a computer pouring my guts out is vastly different compared to sitting across a table from someone and doing it.
So we came up with a few goals for me. The biggest one, by far, is simple:
I want to feel comfortable in my own skin again. I miss that. It wasn't too long ago that I was swimming at the beach with my kids, feeling fit and healthy and alive. Last summer I think I wore a t-shirt maybe twice. All other times, I kept myself covered in some form of tunic/billowing fat girl get up. I skipped the beach, skipped doing things that would force me to shed clothing for fear of letting the world see how far I had let myself go. I went tubing in capris, for God's sake.
This summer won't be a repeat of that. It most likely won't be a repeat of my skinny summer, the one where I wore a bathing suit that didn't have a skirt attached to it, but it certainly will not be another Summer of the Tunic.
But back to the Wellness. Of course, it isn't all about losing weight. Faith wants her clients to be Well all over...mind, spirit AND body. We talked about other goals I have that fall outside the range of simply losing weight. We discussed the importance of family meals, and I made a goal of making healthy dinners that the kids and I will eat together as often as possible. That happens a few times a week here, but with our schedules being so crazy it's becoming harder and harder to do. There's also the fact that the light fixture over our dinner table is no longer working...we've done the candlelight thing but I think it may be time to get that fixed. Although I will say that candlelight really makes my tired spaghetti look mahvelous.
Another goal of mine is to strengthen my friendships. I'm very lucky to have a pretty huge circle of friends, and this is a gift that needs tending now and then. When times get tough, the urge to go hermit is very strong and I've found myself withdrawing from the people I should actually be running towards. There are a few friendships in particular that I've let wax and wane for too long now, and I want to try and get those back on track.
Oooh yeah, and the gym. Let's not forget about that. I started going back there on January 6th, and I'm proud to say that I've made it there about 10 times since then. I'm LOVING it, and even though I think it's too early for really tangible evidence to show itself, I swear that my paunch has gone from the 5 months pregnant stage to maybe 3 days postpartum. I feel stronger and definitely have more energy. Plus? I'm sleeping better than I have in years. There is no scale here at the House of Poor Body Image but if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say I'm down by about 6-8 lbs. Clothes are starting to feel bigger and when I take my jeans off at the end of the day, the grooves in my skin are lighter, I swear. And I don't groan quite as loud when I bend over. Usually the boobs are the first to go with me, but this time the belly is taking one for the team. Thank God. The goal here is to hit the gym 3-5 days a week.
To sum things up: This is a good thing. I am psyched to have someone like Faith in my corner and even more psyched to see how this whole thing pans out. The next month or so may get kind of stressful (the bankruptcy stuff will be starting in full force soon) and I am going to have many chances to try and meet my goals. It's very, very comforting to know that I have someone who isn't enmeshed in my life, an outsider, if you will...who is standing on the sidelines, cheering me on.
I don't know anyone who couldn't use an extra cheerleader. Thank you Faith!
Please take a moment and check out Faith's site, just click here. She's also on Facebook, I love her daily posts about all things Well. I am going to be posting a weekly Wellness update, either Tuesdays or Wednesdays...you know how I roll. Thanks to everyone for your encouragement...before and after pics will be shown. I just have to find a before picture that actually shows my body. I'm very good at hiding behind stuff.
Have a great day my friends...be well!