Imma Effing Bee

William came home from Big Daddy's house last night looking down. I asked him what was wrong and he started crying. Apparently, my presence at his Friday night baseball practice/pizza party put Big Daddy into a tizzy. I had hugged William goodbye when the practice was over, and told him to be a good boy. William got a little teary, as some kids do at the thought of not seeing a parent for 2 days. Big Daddy was watching this, and apparently felt that I was filling our son's brain with awful Daddy-isms or something. William told me that Big Daddy really let him have it in the car on the way home, but I have been told by Big Daddy himself that "William was in his room, crying, and must have overheard me". Whatever...point is, William heard it. Through his tears, William said, "He was calling you really bad names, mom. Effing Bee...only he said the real words. He said if I was so sad I should go back with you only he called you Fat Pig." (I have since been told, by Big Daddy, that the "Fat Pig" reference was in regards to my mouth, not the "shape of your body". Uh huh.)


I have hammered out about half a dozen emails, being very careful to hit "Delete" instead of "Send". I don't know what to do with this one.

I do know that it doesn't take a brain surgeon to see that I'm fat. No shit! I've had a tough go of things for the past year and a half. But you know what? I'd rather be fat than have my kids cry when they're forced to spend time with me.

Sweet gentle readers, please stay married. Like a rock thrown into a still pond, the ripples from a divorce will radiate out for a long freaking time. Nothing in the world is worth seeing your kids go through this crap. Nothing.


  1. I just read through, and OMG! This one in particular has been my experience, as well. Not only my ex, but his wife, too, calling me all sorts of names TO MY KIDS! I'm here to tell you, that it all comes back to them. Neither of my kids have respect for their dad or his wife. Now, they act like they don't have respect for me sometimes, too. What I've stood on for many, many years is the scripture that says, "Vengeance is mine, says the Lord. I will repay." Don't have the chapter and verse handy right now, but I continue to stand on that word. Praying that you, too, will allow the Lord to fight for you!! Love to you. AND - I'm looking forward to scheduling walks with you :)

  2. It truly boggles my mind how a parent can say these things to a child about his/her other parent. My ex walked out on us, not to be heard from for 13+ years, and I've never said a BAD thing about him. It has always been something along the lines of "All I know is it had nothing to do with you or me and everything to do with him." If *I* can find neutral things to say, anyone can. Big Daddy is SUCH a major tool, and karma is a real bitch. *Hugs* to you AND William!! xoxo

  3. Jenny, I love you. If I were a single, Keen-wearin', Under Armour backpack-totin' lesbian, I think we'd make a cute couple. I just read your blog from bottom to top. I LOL'd, I teared up, and I think we need to have a get-together soon!

  4. Your ex is a piece of dog crap on the soles of your shoe. He is not fit to stand in the same vicinity as you or your children. He is a waste of space. Any one who can do that to their child deserves some serious harm inflicted on them. (And I'm not just saying that because I can totally see my cheater husband doing something just like this.) http://dowehavetotellthekids.blogspot.com/2013/04/winning.html

  5. Despite following you for awhile, I haven't read your blog from the beginning. So please deal with my 4 year late comments :)

    This makes me sad for your kids :( I'm not a mom, but a "stepmom" (we're not married) and have witnessed some crummy parenting exchanges from both sides of the fence. While the kids' mom started out extremely high-conflict (physically attacking me once, verbally attacking too many times to count) she has calmed down significantly - even allows me to pick up the kids when dad isn't present now! (This is huge for us).
    However, when tears were shed at exchanges by the little guy (now 5, doesn't cry anymore), she would outright accuse their dad of "doing something to cause this" or asking rather accusingly "what goes on over there that MY CHILDREN are so terrified to go with you?!" Oy.

    You'll probably hear this from me a lot, but thank you for taking the high road. The Secretary doesn't know how good she has it with you as a BM.

  6. Wow!I just started reading your blog...its addictive. Wth? Hes the one who cheats, abandons his wife and kids, lets his new wife treat his kids like unwanted pets, doesnt pay child support because hes broke but somehow manages to buy himself an audi and take his new wife on expensive vacations,later dumps his kids altogether...but calls YOU an effing bee...mmmmkaaayyy. Projection much?


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